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Joke of the Day

"Galactus is about to eat our solar system when he flips over the label WARNING: CONTAINS MERCURY ""No thanks, I'll eat something else."""

"Who handles font related crimes? A sans sheriff!"

"I once donated a pint of blood and the doctors were quite greatful. They said it contained enough alcohol to sterilize their equipment."

"Okay so I know this one joke which might be a bit offensive. Cracked me up though What's great about fucking 22 year olds'?"

"What's an owl's favorite song? The Who's Who are you? Hoot hoot. Hoot hoot."

"Down in de islands, what do they call de dew in de morning? Daylight come!"

"Women are like hurricanes... They enter your life wet and wild, and they leave with your lawn furniture THAT WE BOUGHT TOGETHER SARAH, YOU BITCH."

"What will fast food workers say in Trump's Amerika? Arbeit Macht Freis with that?"

"Two Calamari Two calamari walk into a pub. Bartender asks, ""What'll ya have?"" ""We'll have a Hurricane and a Sex On the Beach"" says squid A. Bartender pauses and says, ""That'll be three squid then."""

"I've recently been finding myself to be sexually attracted to tall buildings. I guess you could call it a serious Edifice complex."