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Joke of the Day

"Just looked in my 8 yr old son's bedroom and I'm pretty sure it can't be ruled out that the Malaysian jet may be in there somewhere."

"The Somalian Olympics team has just apologised The Somalian Olympics Team has just apologised to the Olympic Committee after realising that sailing and shooting were 2 separate events!!"

"""Sleep is for the dead"". Yeah cos you look so alive when you're yawning. #stupidsayings"

"What did Donald Duck say to Goofy? I Fucked your Dad !! Lol !!"

"I was roasting meat and accidentally stabbed myself with a meat thermometer and blood is gushing out. I'm done."

"Daddy! Tell me a story.. The Tooth Fairy is really a wicked witch, who takes all your teeth if you sleep with your mouth open. Good night."

"My signature move at family dinners is waiting for someone to put their drink down at the table & then moving it when they go to the buffet."

"What is Hitler's favorite chocolate? Fuhrerro Rocher"

"Why did the farmer feed his pigs sugar and vinegar ? He wanted sweet and sour pork !"

"I kept wondering why the Frisbee kept getting bigger and bigger. Then it hit me."