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Joke of the Day

"My kid sold your honor student a quarter ounce of oregano."

"Kids, make sure you learn how to use a protractor in case one day you're a teacher & have to show kids how to use a protractor."

"A neutron walks into a bar... and inquires how much a drink costs. The bartender replies, ""For you? No charge."""

"Did you hear about the new strain of bird flu? Chirpees... a canarial disease... un-tweetable."

"How hard do you think Joe Biden laughs when a senate's bill gets 69 votes? I bet he has to leave the room."

"Kid: would you rather be the Evil Queen or the Wicked Witch? M: I'd rather be the Mom K: ooh, right. Much scarier."

"A solid way to make your waiter's head explode is to order a grilled cheese with no bread."

"What's the difference between a Jew and Harry Potter? Harry Potter escapes the chamber"

"Windows: ""You may be the victim of software counterfeiting"" no Microsoft,it is you who is the victim of software counterfeiting here, not I"

"polish priest sacked by the Vatican...... Well that's really taken the shine off the pope :)"