54394

Joke of the Day

"Procrastination is a really deep word. I'll tell you guys the rest some other day."

"Shop Locally. Sometimes we have the thing you need maybe I dunno come back next week."

"Two blonde girls... ...were driving to Disneyland. The sign said: Disneyland left. They started crying and headed home."

"If anyone advises you how much lettuce to put on your burger, stop them right there. That's just the tip of the iceberg."

"My girlfriend hates when I make jokes about her weight. She needs to lighten up."

"Did U hear they're remaking 'Dirty Dancing' & Miley Cyrus is gonna play the abortion."

"Sorry people with seeing eye dogs that say 'No petting'. What you can't see won't hurt you."

"Not many people knew that Albert Einstein had a brother that was an evil scientist that experimented with cadavers. His name was Frank"

"What do you do when you are riding on the back of a zebra, right next to a camel, and a lion won't stop chasing you? Get off the carousel, dumb ass. You're drunk."

"What's the difference between George W. Bush and Hitler? Hitler was an evil *genius*."