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Joke of the Day

"Why Did John Lennon Get shot? Yoko Ducked"

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"Men are like vacuum cleaners. They're not much fun but at least you get to push them around."
"What kind of sex do you have with twenty seven year olds? Any kind you want, there's twenty of them."
"What do bacteria eat for breakfast? prokaryoats"
"What do you call a German barber? Herr Kutz (This was funnier when I was half asleep this morning)"
"What did the elephant say to the naked man? How do you pick up anything with that?"
"some simple jokes whats big white and falls out of a tree? a fridge whats green and has wheels? grass i was lying about the wheels"
"Start a slow-clap in a quiet, crowded room. The first person that joins you, marry them. They're your soulmate."
"Why didn't Hitler get an A on the math exam? He didn't complete the final solution. I wrote that in my sleep."
"Saw HBO were going to be making a new TV show set in an airport... They had to cancel it though as the pilot didn't take off."