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Joke of the Day

"TREE: [sees christmas tree thru window] who dose he think he is. all dressed up. too good to be outside ANOTHER TREE: be nice, he is dying"

"Why can't you run in a camp ground? You can only 'ran'; it's past tents."

"Arguing with a woman is like being attacked by a bear... You're better off playing dead and hoping they get bored and walk away!"

"What do you call a women with two brain cells? Pregnant with twins"

"date: so wat do u wana do next me: why dont we slip into somthing more...convertible [climbs into ferrari] date: omg wow is this ur car me: no"

"What did the ghost say to the bee? Boobee!"

"How do you get an emo out of a tree? Cut the rope imsosorry:("

"The only time my wife will ever scream ""Deeper, deeper!""... Is when they are lowering my casket into the ground."

"What do you call a gay dinosaur? A Megasoreass"

"I may have hit rock bottom, but the upside of being down here, is I can see up all of your skirts. As you were."