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Joke of the Day

"Confucius say... Man who walk through airport sideways going to Bangkok."

"With the amount of people who hide their identity online you'd think this place is rampant with superheroes."

"I'm glad it's the thought that counts because I spend all day thinking about the shit I should be doing."

"First The Doctor Told Me The Good News I Was Going To Have A Disease Named After Me"

"Do flashers have dreams where they leave the house and suddenly realize they've got their pants on?"

"Know how to get a lot of head? Give Michael J. Fox a pitcher of beer"

"Friend: you should come over tonight. we're watching 'How to Train Your Dragon 2' Me: Friend: Me: to what? Friend:"

"80% of men say they'd marry the same woman all over again. Related: 80% of men are afraid that what they say will get back to their wives."

"Sometimes I type a 'C' when I meant to type an 'A'. And now I have to apologize to my 'Aunt'"

"It sucks that Mary and Joseph couldn't get a room at an inn..... but what were they expecting not having a reservation on Christmas Eve of all nights!"