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Joke of the Day
"The last time I twisted the night away it resulted in two law suits and a medicare plan."
Next Joke
"Twitter's still doing that thing where I'm not funny."
"I love Honest Abe. Do you want to hear my favourite quote from him? ""My head hurts."""
"There is a tribe in Africa that worships the number zero. Is nothing sacred?"
"What does Tony Romo and a porn star have in common? They both know how to choke."
"2 Wind Turbines walk into a bar... The first says, ""What kind of music do you like?"" The second says, ""I'm a heavy metal fan."""
"I lost my voice so basically I'm every mans dream girl right now."
"What do you get when you plant a loaf of bread? A bakery."
"How do you fix a monkey? With a Monkey Wrench!"
"You know that feeling of shame, when you put it in the wrong hole? You wonder why it doesn't fit, and when you look down you just get sad. I'm talking about belts, of course. What did you think!?"