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Joke of the Day

"I love trigger warnings... They help victims of abuse know what's ahead, and they help me spot Trump supporters."

"When you drop the toilet paper and the roll world unravels before your eyes"

"What do you call a fish that's on its way to somewhere? Salmon en route"

"17: If I was gay would you still love me? Me: Of course. 17: If I committed crimes? Me: Yes. 17: If I voted for Trump- Me: Dead to me."

"24 bugs in the code 24 bugs in the code... Take one down patch it all out... 78 bugs in the code..."

"What do vegetables watch when they're horny? Corn"

"What doe you call a banana's grandmother? Banana-nana"

"Why don't vultures eat at restaurants? They don't allow carrion."

"How many feminist does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because feminist can't change anything."

"My girlfriend told me she loved me and wanted to marry me so I shot her in self defense."