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Joke of the Day

"Stand in a crowd, put your finger to your ear secret agent style, say out loud ""target is in site!"", see who panics."

Next Joke
 
"There's been something wrong with my smelling lately... I've asked everyone, but no one ""nose"" the cause!"
"What's Beethoven's favorite fruit? Ba na na naaa"
"When in dangerous situation - you should always sleep with one eye opened. Especially if you're a Cyclops."
"*interview for new roommate* Ninja: I know it's a small place, but you won't even know I'm here."
"ME: Did you hear Jack & Cindy got divorced and he's dating someone half his age? HUB: Yep. He's livin the dream ME: HUB: His dream not mine"
"I just lost my virginity! And so did my 6-year old sister."
"Taught the 5yo to say ""totes magotes"" to annoy my husband who can't figure out why the kid keeps yelling, ""COACH MY GOATS, DAD!"" Nailed it."
"[trying to buy pants] Clerk: Sir you need pants to shop here."
"*man lies on death bed* But it can't be my time. I have...so much more...constructive criticism to give..."