50321

Joke of the Day

"I broke up with her... Her name was ""anti gravity"" and she would never ""go down"" on me."

"- How much for the mobile tampon? - Ma'am? - It's a bit big. - Ma'am, it's a lamb. - Does it make that sound because it has detected blood?"

"[Guy goes on a date w me] Hm not sure if he likes me [13 more dates] Dunno? [Marries me] It's so confusing [Stays w me 30 yrs] How do u tell"

"The Dominos ""tracker"" says Ashley just left with my pizza so I only have a few minutes to get naked. Just glad it's not Brad... ...again."

"If homosexuals come out of the closet, do necrophiliacs come out of the casket?"

"Hell, even an 80-year-old prostitute works more often than twitter."

"An eight-year-old kid says t his dad ""When I grow up I want to be a musician."" The dad says ""I am sorry -- can't have it both ways."""

"How to get out of ANY jam. Switch to jelly."

"Nachos on Christmas Eve. We're celebrating the birth of cheeses!"

"Why is the Canadian school system broken because they only give out ehs"