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Joke of the Day
"What do you call two Mexicans playing basketball? Juan on Juan"
Next Joke
"""Hey man what happened to you, you look like you've been in a fight?"" - ""You should see the other guy..."" ""He was fucking huge, I didn't stand a chance"""
"gonna give my zombie friend several different brains for his deathday. Took a while to get the shopping done. Finally got some presents of mind."
"You staring at your phone= jerk. Me staring at my phone= cool guy with lots of shit happening in his life."
"French pastries are scary They give me the crepes."
"Waiter there is a worm on my plate ! That's not a worm sir it's your sausage ?"
"Word of the day: exhaustipated. Too tired to give a shit."
"What is the difference between Jedward and a vacuum cleaner? A vacuum cleaner only sucks when you turn it on."
"Who was the only president that was not guilty? Lincoln. He was in a cent."
"My friend told me if im upset about something i should sleep on it... I told him to give it a rest."