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Joke of the Day

"If a rapper named e came out as gay He would say E=MCQUEERED"

"Why was Oedipus against profanity? Because he kisses his mother with that mouth"

"I went to an extremely attractive female doctor today for my annual checkup. She told me that I had to quit masturbating. I asked why and she said, ""Because I'm trying to examine you."""

"I bet Egyptians were all like ""Yo, nobody in history will ever worship and revere cats like we do"" and then came the internet."

"What is your favourite variable? I'm not sure, It's always changing."

"What do you call a snail in the sea? A snailor."

"The boss said I need to be more of a team player, so I rounded up all my coworkers & we kicked his ass."

"What does GOP mean? ""GOP"" is onomatopoeic: it's the sound of anonymous penetration in public bathrooms late at night. -&y"

"Patient (to cosmetic surgeon): Will it hurt me doctor? Surgeon: Only when you get my bill Mrs Brown."

"I can't handle the pressure of competitions. Even in eating races I choke!"