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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between acne and a priest? Acne waits till you're 12 to come on your face."

"Good is the enemy of great. Sponge is the enemy of math. Metaphysics is the enemy of Walmart."

"My wife is going to the hair salon today so for the next few hours I will be practising my reaction."

"What file does a Knight store his music on? A **MIDI**-val file."

"I put on my favorite disco album yesterday. My wife tried telling me disco was dead. I said ""No honey, it's not. You're thinking of your mother."

"I keep getting bills from the Memory Erasing Clinic but I've never been there"

"Did you hear about the fly that flew through a screen door? He strained himself."

"What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? It's easy to roast beef..."

"Just gave the Earth a one-star rating and a bad review on TripAdvisor to discourage any aliens that were planning an invasion."

"What do you call a fake pasta? An impasta."