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Joke of the Day

"What do you call a black person that can fly a plane? A pilot, you racist fucks. P.S Wasn't that well received in anti-jokes, so I figured it might work better here."

Next Joke
 
"What would Ronald Reagan be doing if he were alive today? He'd be scratching at the lid of his coffin yelling, ""Let me out! I'm alive! Let me out!!"""
"Spending this evening saving Princess Zelda, because Princess Zelda has never 'accidentally' hooked up with her Sociology T.A. while abroad."
"My wife says that all she wants is an attentive lover...... ...or maybe it was a tent of lovers. I don't really know, I wasn't paying attention."
"Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Honestly I'm so shit faced I have no idea."
"Nothing, I'm just tired. -every woman, 3 days before they tell you what's wrong"
"A blind guy walks into a bar.... and a table...and a stool...and a door"
"I'm addicted to drinking brake fluid. But I can stop anytime."
"*Cooks dinner for family* Gets arrested for attempting to cause great bodily harm"
"I got one for you guys... Donald Trump"