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Joke of the Day

"Did you know the person who created Knock Knock jokes won a nobel peace prize?"

"Man, Helen Keller would have been fun to party with. She's always blacked out."

"Why did the pet proctologist fear his first feline procedure? Because wether he succeeded or failed, he knew he'd end up with a cat-ass-trophy on his hands."

"Why is Santa's ball sack so big? He only comes once a year."

"Starbucks job interview: ""What's your name?"" ""Alyssa"" ""Spell that please"" ""L A R I S S A"" ""When can you start?"""

"What do tornados and black people have in common? It only takes one to ruin a neighborhood"

"When you go to the movies first thing you need to do is pour a drink in the seat in front of you so nobody can sit there.."

"Diagnosing myself on WebMD after smoking a joint is a terrible idea, i always end up with HIV and I probably just have gas (and now anxiety)"

"Q: What's worse than raining cats and dogs? A: Hailing taxis."

"How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? To get to the other side."