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Joke of the Day

"got a fake ID w a picture of shrek on it. works everytime. bought ten shrek dvds w it just this morning. lady at the counter didnt say SHIT"

"What's a woman's favorite keyboard key? Ctrl"

"Did you hear about the NASCAR driver who went the wrong way around the track? It turned out to be all right."

"What do vegetarian zombies eat? Graiins!"

"Why did the whale cross the road ? To get to the other tide !"

"What's the difference between an entomologist and an etymologist? An etymologist would know"

"What's in the toilet of the Star Ship enterprise? The captains log"

"If you ever see me with one of those stick figure family bumper stickers it means I'm dead and someone is wearing my skin"

"In 1000 years, archaeologists will find tanning beds and think we fried people as punishments."

"Skydiving without a parachute is a once in a lifetime experience."