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Joke of the Day
"Q: What do you get when you cross a ghost and a the letter K? A: A book."
Next Joke
"My life is a lot like that driver who signals right, but turns left."
"Schizophrenia? More like Schizofriendia. *voices agree*"
"""Come reckon with me bro."" -Force"
"How did the Roman cut his hair? Caesar"
"How many handicapped guys does it take to change a light bulb? Just one if it's Professor X."
"What did the Hispanic fireman name his two twin sons? Jose and Hose B"
"ME: Why are you leaving? WIFE: I have hated every stupid pun of yours since we left Manhasset 20 years ago ME: Manhasset been that long?"
"PERSONAL TRAINER: How's your nutrition? ME: *dipping my burrito into custard* Not going to lie. It's been worse."
"A cabbage, a faucet, and a tomato had a race. The cabbage was ahead, thefaucet was running, and the tomato tried to catch up."