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Joke of the Day
"I drank half a bottle of NyQuil and tried to call Audrey Hepburn on my microwave"
Next Joke
"The Olympians stories are amazing! The Ukrainian whose family was killed, the Korean who escaped slavery, the American who never had wifi."
"What is Bear Grylls' favorite snack brand? Nature's Valley"
"What do you call an aardvark that plays poker? A cardvark!"
"What did the time traveller do after he ate the last bite of his dinner? He went back 4 seconds."
"My parole officer said ""You know who you hurt the most when you go joyriding?"" ""Joy's husband."""
"*Reads about a Salmonella outbreak on lettuce -NEVER eats Salad again! *Reads about the dangers of Alcohol poisoning -NEVER reads again!"
"How do you know a woman has had sex in every country in the world? Her pussy is well cultured."
"How many software engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None, that's a hardware problem."
"Why are the majority of school shooters white? Because the black kids don't wanna get kicked off the basketball team."