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Joke of the Day
"How do you tell the teams apart in Amish women's basketball? It's skirts versus shins."
Next Joke
"Next on *Will it Blend?* Marijuana! ***Brrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr*** *opens lid* ""Ahh, you can *definitely* breathe this."""
"Is it safe for Ryan Gosling to wink at a girl that's already pregnant or does it like, poke the baby?"
"I've been married a long time, but I bet first dates are still the same. Lots of awkward arguments about Reaganomics."
"What problem afflicts 40% of all pedophiles? Immature ejaculation"
"You'll never get hemorrhoids... because you're a perfect asshole."
"My wife got a seashell tattoo on her thigh. When you put your ear on it you can smell the ocean."
"What's the difference between Pussy and Parsley? Nobody eats Parsley. (said at Christmas dinner by my 100 year old great Aunt)"
"How do you know your sister is on her period?..... Your father's dick tastes like blood..."
"[spending entire date hiding the fact I'm really a beaver] ""ow"" what's wrong? ""I got a splinter"" may I see? ""I guess so"" delicious ""pardon?"""