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Joke of the Day

"Hey everyone, my mom's following me on Twitter now, so ixnay on all the eetstway about the ugsdray and exsay and acismray. Thanks"

Next Joke
 
"Post this on your Facebook then count your programmer friends. My phone is broken, please send me message on my Facebook or my Gmail."
"I guess this is why they don't let kids be lawyers You just know one would've gotten Jared off."
"During love scenes in a Wes Anderson movie, the sound effects guy rubs a baguette against corduroy."
"Contest in a girl's college write a short story which contains religion, sex and mystery. Winner's story Oh god I am pregnant I wonder who did it"
"Why does Kim Jong Un love books Because he's the glorious Reader"
"Comic Sans is like if Guy Fieri were a font."
"Dad always thought laughter was the best medicine which I guess is why several of us died of tuberculosis."
"ME (wearing Tommy Hilfiger): ready to go? GF: not until u put on something less hideous TOMMY HILFIGER (climbs off me): that was unnecessary"
"Worst joke I know. How do you make a 5 year old cry twice? Wipe your bloody dick on their favorite teddybear."