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Joke of the Day

"Some morbid baby jokes What's scarier then ten babies in one jar? A: One baby in ten jars How do you got a baby in a container? A: blend it."

"I thought about logging into Myspace, but the Delorean is in the shop."

"Oh my god Becky look at her roast beef sandwich"

"Im excited to have Tubman on the twenty So we can use black people as currency again"

"Ann: I wanna break up Ed: why? A: you use time travel to manipulate me E: when, exactly, did you start to suspect this? A: well... Hey!"

"Did you hear why Clippy stopped posting on reddit? He got .docxed."

"Kidnapping is such a strong word, I prefer to think of it as Surprise Adoption"

"My white cat has been beating up my black cat a lot lately so I guess he's been reading the news and knows he won't get punished for it."

"I was riding in my friend's car today when I noticed he didn't have a brake pedal. He said it only slowed him down."

"How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard I throw them."