43215

Joke of the Day

"A baby seal walks into a club."

"Rejected names for lumberjacks: -Woodroberts -Treedaves -Logjeffs -Forestbills -Timberjims"

"I saw a guy today with soot all over his face carrying a large pick axe and wearing a royal blue hardhat that matched his overalls. But these are just miner details."

"Me: Siri, why am I alone? Siri: *opens front facing camera*"

"I use so many age defying crinkle creams that I don't have finger prints anymore."

"Created a Kickstarter for my movie. Hoping to raise enough for a popcorn and soda too."

"I didn't know you could get paid for donating sperm. When I think of all the money I've let slip through my fingers..."

"Why do bakers work so hard? Because they knead the dough."

"SPOILER ALERT: I just had a piece of metal fitted to the back of my car to reduce drag and increase fuel efficiency."

"Why did the bigamist cross the road? To get to the other bride."