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Joke of the Day

"What is a Jawa's favorite vegetable? Zucchini"

"A man fought off a polar bear yesterday using only his cell phone... it was probably a blackberry. The bear was so disgusted he just left."

"As a kid i looked up to Bill Nye the science guy, but as of today after learning about him i will probably look down on him. And people at my level would agree. I'm 6'3 and he is 6 feet tall."

"I married Miss Right... I just didn't know her first name was Always."

"There are two kinds of people in this world that I cannot stand * Those who are intolerant to other people's cultures. * The Dutch."

"Him: Let's get you out of that dress. Me: Be careful Him: Why? Me: If you tug at my Spanx hard enough, I'll pop open like a can of biscuits."

"Why did the lobster blush? Because the see weed."

"why are fish good astronauts? They love trouter space!"

"/r/programming joke On a scale if 0 to 1, does it hurt?"

"What's the difference between a woman with PMS and a terrorist? You can negotiate with a terrorist."