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Joke of the Day

"What did the mama frog say to the baby frog when they left for a party? ""You better amphi-BE-ON your best behavior."""

"I'masinglesexuallyfrustratedastronaut.YouknowwhatIcouldreallygofor? aSpaceBar"

"It's hurts for me to say this... But I have a sore throat."

"The lights at this chinese dumpling place were too bright I had to ask them to Dim Sum"

"Sorry, just got your text. Are we still on for last night?"

"One in every 2 and a half men is HIV positive."

"I have ADHD and have troubles getting to sleep. Doctor recommended counting sheep... 1 sheep. 2 sheep. 3 sheep. Cow. Duck. Horse. *Old MacDonald had a farm* and bingo was his name-o!"

"What's the definition of relative humidity? The sweat that accumulates under your balls when you're fucking you're sister."

"What do you call someone who only watches Horror Anime? A Ouijaboo."

"My mom just took away my mood ring. I don't know how I feel about it."