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Joke of the Day

"What did the nucleus say to get the electron up? Up and atom!"

"Genie: I shall grant you three wis- Me: I wish my ex would fall back in love with me Genie: here's the thing Jeff, Kate's with me now..."

"Help your friends diet by replacing the light in their fridge with an air horn."

"I've never been wrong Once I thought I was wrong, but I was mistaken."

"Did you hear about the Mexican bricklayer who went crazy trying to lay a cornerstone in a roundhouse."

"Why did Putin forget his backpack at home when leaving for school? He was Russian."

"My dick is like news... ...because it passes from mouth to mouth."

"I'm going to start rapping under the name ""Jay Y"" So I can tell Jay Z ""I'm coming for you"""

"Two nuns met a exhibitionist. One had a stroke. The other one just watched it."

"What do you call a Mexican with crazy intentions? A locomotive!"