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Joke of the Day
"When a roofer works pro bono... It's on the house"
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"How many psychiatrists does it take to change a lightbulb? One but the lightbulb has to want to change."
"The best part of being incompetent to cook and feed myself is that when I travel I am positive I didn't leave the oven on."
"This summer I'm going to go to the beach and bury metal objects that say, 'Get a life' on them. Demetri Martin"
"I made a false deity out of bubble wrap today I call Him Pop Idol"
"Two Irishmen walk out of a pub."
"Cephalopod humour How much does it cost to treat an ill octopus? Six Quid...."
"I like my coffee like I like my women.... .....black and with a dick in it."
"You want hear Latvian joke? Okay, I am tell... Why Latvian take so good pictures? No potato."
"*stranded on island* *puts message in bottle and throws it into sea* *years later gets message back* what's updog? *fist pump*"