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Joke of the Day

"Q: What's delaying the Polish space program? A: Development of a working match."

"How do you know your friend has been at the gym? Don't worry, he'll tell you."

"For my new year's resolution I will stop replying to funny jokes I hear by saying LOL"

"Did you hear about the nurse who died and went straight to hell? It took her two weeks to realize that she wasn't at work anymore!"

"When John Wayne died, he had 40 pounds of fecal matter in his intestines. It sounds like a lot of shit, but it's true."

"A friend of ours is practicing baking apple pies. She brings them over to our house and later asks us how we liked it. I tell her ""You need more practice."""

"Satan: ""Waaazzz up?"" God: ""Speak of the Devil."" Satan: ""Really?"" God: ""Sorry, figure of speech."" Satan: ""Jesus Christ."" Jesus: ""What?"""

"Doctor Doctor I'm having trouble with my breathing. I'll give you something that will soon put a stop to that!"

"Benedict Cumberbatch announced that he's really well known now To which I say ""No shit, Sherlock."""

"Police officer: ""Can you identify yourself, sir?"" Driver pulls out his mirror and says: ""Yes, it's me"""