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Joke of the Day

"My girlfriend said I'm too immature for her. ""If I'm immature, how come I've got an Arsfor?"" She said ""What's an Arsfor?"" ""Shitting!"" I said, and giggled for 20 minutes."

"Do you know the difference ""Hey, do you know what the difference is between window curtains and toilet paper?"" ""No."" ""So it was you then!!!"""

"Why does the Easter Bunny hide the eggs? Because he doesn't want anybody to know that he's been fucking chickens!"

"if you come trick or treating at my house you will leave with less candy than what you had"

"The best way to get a job is to hold the other person's hand through the interview. If you don't get hired, no worries. You made a friend."

"NSFW What do you get when you stab a toddler with a pair of scissors? An erection."

"How do you know when your girlfriend is putting on too much weight? She starts fitting into your wife's clothes."

"Wives live longer than their husbands.. because they are not married to a woman (Courtesy ""Whose Line It is Anyway"")"

"""Everything the light touches is ours,"" I tell my son while opening the fridge."

"Why don't people get married in North Korea? Well, all marriages are legal in North Korea, but no one has them because there's no rice to throw."