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Joke of the Day

"Just got a joke after 2 weeks. Pavlov is sitting down reading a book. All of the sudden the phone rings and he says ""Fuck,I forgot to feed the dogs""."

"[gets pulled over] cop: ""sir, do you know how fast you were going?"" [i've swapped places with the dog] me: ""answer the man"""

"What do you get when you sleep with someone and it goes really well? High sexpectations."

"What do you call a penguin in the desert? Lost."

"Sure, I'd get married. But follow him on Twitter? I'm not ready for that kind of commitment."

"Have you heard the joke you are never supposed to tell a gay person? Oh. Sorry."

"What do you call a blind deer? No eye deer"

"What receives a man's first blowjob? An NES cartridge."

"I identify as a sexual atheist With a strong belief that I will never get laid."

"Why was the Tibetan monk celibate? Because he didn't give a fuck."