33732

Joke of the Day

"What's the worst part of... About locking your keys in your car outside the abortion clinic? Going in to ask for at coat hanger."

"Man found dead in chicken coop. Fowl play suspected."

"Wife is out of town until tomorrow night. Anyone wanna come sit on the other end of the sofa and ignore me?"

"If I had a dollar for every person alive I wanted to kill... I might have let a few of them live."

"Mother Teresa walks into a bar"

"The phrase ""Getting nickeled and dimed"" hasn't kept up with inflation... We're definitely getting dollared now."

"[nsfw] the ultimate trifecta of dirty joke so, i was going down on my grandma, and i started to taste donkey semen, i looked up at my dear sweet grandma and said, "" jeez, grandma thats how you died?"""

"When you get to your wit's end, You'll find God lives there."

"My pal is 6 ft 5, and his wife of ten years is only 3ft 10. After a decade of marriage he's still nuts over her."

"Why does ISIS only drink drip coffee? Because they hate French Press!"