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Joke of the Day

"Snail Racing My friend owned a racing snail. It never won any races so he removed the shell to make it go faster. Sadly it didn't work, if anything it made it more sluggish"

"Louisville Slugger makes professional baseball bats from kiln dried Chuck Norris turds."

"what did the doctor say to the midget? you'll just have to be a little patient"

"If you wear a man bun in a dimly lit restaurant and I call you ma'am... That's on you."

"This blonde is so stupid she called me to get my telephone number!"

"After 15 years, I finally met my dad. He's a pharmacist."

"Fire engines are painted red for camouflage, so they can sneak up on fires without being noticed"

"What does a guy with 2 right feet wear to the beach? Flop-Flops"

"Say what you will about that pilot... ...but at least he died doing what German's love most. Mass murdering innocent people."

"He's as sharp as a bowling ball."