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Joke of the Day

"Imagine if you killed a shark then got reincarnated as a shark but the shark you killed was really popular & all the sharks knew it was you."

"Did you hear about the nun that bites her nails? You can say she has a bad habit."

"This weekend is daylight savings time, which means the clock on my microwave will be right again."

"Laziness is when a person doesn't fake that he's working."

"I can still party like I'm 22. Too bad I recover like I'm 82."

"TURTLE: hey, you carry your house around too! HERMIT CRAB: i do. where'd you find yours? T: i was born with it HC: *scoff* ok princess"

"Why is Rosie O'Donell fat? Because she likes to eat out!"

"Q: What is hail? A: Hard-boiled rain."

"Guys, Trump isn't Hitler... ...because Hitler actually won the popular vote."

"How did the writer pop the question? He per-prosed"