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Joke of the Day

"French pastry bakers are scary They give me the crepes."

"What did the Middle Eastern terrorist say when he was captured by the police? Oman!"

"People say I'm not good with Greek Mythology... I guess that it's my Achilles wrist."

"My favorite part about being an adult is that my pillow fort now has a mini bar."

"What is green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels."

"I just finished deadlifting 1000 pounds off the ground. For you Americans, that's 1275 dollars. It's my most expensive lift to date."

"When grammar nazis correct me, I start to make errors on purpose to mess with them. You can say I'm passive, aggressive."

"You're a big fat liar! And I don't believe anything you say! See if I get naked for you again!! -Me to my scale as I step off of it"

"I was once involved in a sex ring... until my circle of friends said that things were getting awkward."

"In my opinion, the most important part of any meal is the ingredients"