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Joke of the Day

"My ex-girlfriend made a really great cake the other day Getting her legs to fit in the oven was a real hassle, though."

"Do you know how I feel about muscle relaxers? I valium."

"How would you feel if you were raped for every rape joke you made? Sore"

"I heard diarrhea is hereditary It runs in your jeans"

"Mexican Olympic Team Why doesn't Mexico send a team to the Summer Olympics? Because all the one that can run, jump, or swim are already in the US."

"How do you know an angle is dead? When it shows no vital sines"

"Why won't A Flock of Seagulls perform in the Middle East? Iran so far away"

"When you ask her ""Have you ever read Shakespeare?"" And she answers ""No, who wrote it?"" .... Keep moving."

"[goes to museum of fine art] ""Just how fine can this art be, anyway"" [sees a vase in a thong] ""oh damn"""

"Q: What is the difference between Dan Quayle Bill Clinton and Jane Fonda? A: Jane Fonda went to Vietnam."