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Joke of the Day

"What are the two problems Donald Trump is currently being treated for ? 1) Electile Dysfunction and 2) Premature Congratulations."

"The Pope originally wanted to invite Hillary to speak but the Vatican couldn't afford it."

"I'm at my most cardio when I am moving the treadmill into storage"

"An idea only achieves transcendence after it is: 1. Published as book 2. Made into a feature film 3. Turned into an amusement park ride"

"If light travels faster than sound. Then why do I always hear a honk before the light turn green?"

"I told my comrades that the commissar is an idiot. I got 31 years gulag... 1 year for insulting a political officer, 30 years for revealing a state secret"

"The thing about human relationships is that one person can be so overcome by a moment while the other person is thinking about KFC..."

"girls you can't take a picture in slutty clothing and glasses and label it ""nerd lol"" you're not a nerd, you're a whore who found glasses."

"What goes 99-clonk 99-clonk 99-clonk ? A centipede with a wooden leg !"