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Joke of the Day

"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's a really obscure number. You've probably never heard of it."

"I was fired from my job for placing the vegetables in sexually suggestive ways Apparently you can't do that if you're a specials-eds teacher"

"That hot guy you see on the train every day with headphones on? Imagine....imagine if he was listening to a podcast. Not so hot now is he?"

"why do Indians have red dots on there forehead? because the council leader with his pointed finger pushing against there foreheads says ""No your not having another free council house"""

"Why doesn't Melania Trump want to be the first lady? Because she would have to move into a smaller house."

"What did one bean say to the other? How you bean doing."

"Some people can have all the lights on and still be in the dark."

"How do you feel if you cross a sheepdog with a melon ? Melon-collie !"

"First Kangaroo: If you were surrounded by 30 lions 25 elephants and 10 hippos how would you get away from them? Second Kangaroo: Step off the merry-go-round."

"There are three kinds of people Those who can count and those who can't"