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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between Ann Coulter and a bucket of shit? The bucket."

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"What did the joints say to the arthritis pain? Uh-Leave! I made this up when I was a little kid and naturally thought I was a comedic genius for many unfortunate years to come."
"If President Bernie Sanders were to die in office... And an elaborate homage to Weekend at Bernie's was undertaken to cover up that fact, he'd still have less strings than Hillary Clinton."
"FUN PRANK: when a stranger hands you their phone to take a picture of their family, take a selfie instead and also steal their phone"
"My kids constantly yell at me whenever I try take their pictures, and I tell 'em: ""You're gonna need them in 20 years for your Throw Back Thursdays updates""..... whatever!!"
"What do you call a singer who sells meat? A Deli."
"How many feminists does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One to screw in the light bulb, two to make a documentary about it."
"*i get home riding a pig* Wife: Hey honey, how was the ""Hog Riders"" meeting? Me: *sighs* Pointless...this one was for motorcycles too."
"Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?"
"What did the sweet potato say to the Israelites. ""I am but a Yam"""