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Joke of the Day

"I'm good at 2 things: interviews and first dates... Turns out they're a bit alike. One gets me a job that blows, the other gets me a blowjob."

"I like my women like I like my Starbucks Sack off"

"Sign in restaurant window: ""Eat now - Pay waiter."""

"*wins oscar I'd like to thank my legs,for always supporting me;my arms,who are always by my side& also my fingers,I can always count on them"

"TIL: During a military coup ...most people just stand around and do nothing."

"I found out about you from my last nightmare."

"Why didn't you come to the halloween party? I was at the Halloween party as a ninja. ""But I didn't see you there."" ""Exactly."""

"What did one black guy say to another black guy? We're both black guys."

"FROM: Harvard SUBJ: Your PhD application We are unable to accept you at this time as ""Teaching Squirrels Karate"" is too cool for us."

"why did the chicken head cross the road? to ghetto the other side..."