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Joke of the Day

"Three tampons are walking down the road. What one says hi? **None!** Their all *stuck up bitches!*"

"what do you call a sad ditch? a depression."

"[in space] ASTRONAUT: Up here you can have delusions ME: Haha I don't think so A: They can seem real GANDALF: Don't believe him ME: I don't"

"Have you ever heard of the similarities between a choo choo tran and a brthday? Neither have i"

"Why did the citizen run for Sewer Commissioner? He thought it was his civic doodie!"

"oh, youvve read a few academic papers on the matter? cute. i have read over 100000 posts."

"Scientists discover that caterpillars can whistle. Am I the only one wondering if they're concentrating their efforts on the wrong things?"

"A proctologist walks into a bar Hostess: Would you like to take a stool or grab a seat? Doctor: Hell no, just a beer, I do that all day."

"A joke about a hangman's noose... You probably thought it's knot funny, but there's a twist at the end."

"How many dead hookers does it take to screw in a light bulb? I don't know, but it's not five, because my basement is still dark."