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Joke of the Day
"What's Alderaan's main export? Dead bodies."
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"""So tell me more about yourse-PUT DOWN MY FRIES IF YOU WANT TO WALK OUT OF HERE WITH ALL 4 LIMBS INTACT."" - What not to say on a first date."
"Theres no point in tailgating me when I'm going 50 in a 35 zone Also, those red flashing lights on your car look ridiculous"
"Next time you're on the phone and a customer service rep asks ""Is there anything else I can do for you?"" whisper ""Smile for the camera, I'm watching you"" & hang up."
"Why did the black man walk into a bar? Because the cell door was still locked."
"I guess now we'll never know if they were identical or fraternal twin towers :("
"What's the best thing about being a female mime? There's no glass ceiling"
"""And why did you join our gym?"" to stay healthy a friend recommended it I've seen myself naked"
"Men get frustrated because they don't understand how women think. Women get frustrated because they understand how men think."
"Just saw Jennifer Aniston on the cover of ""Magazine Cover"" magazine."