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Joke of the Day

"I wish corn would teach other foods how to explode into a different food that's 10 times better."

"'I Now Pronounce You Man and WiFi'"

"What's another name for a hemorrhoid? A cock blocker"

"A friend of ours is practicing baking apple pies. She brings them over to our house and later asks us how we liked it. I tell her ""You need more practice."""

"I'll say it: fuck you, old people."

"The inventor of the toilet must've had a rough time at his presentation. ""Oh here comes Gary with his poop throne idea"""

"Everyday I get at least 3 people who follow me and then immediately delete their accounts. proposed theory: My tweets kill people."

"How many /r/Jokes users does it take to screw in a lightbulb Six. One to actually do it, and five to complain how it's the same one they've seen before."

"EXCLUSIVE OFFER: 1,000 tampons for only $5 No strings attached."

"Relationship Status: Got put in the friend zone by a succubus playing around on a Ouija board. I can't even get lucky in the spirit world."