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Joke of the Day

"Funny knock knock jokes to use during sex. Keep it going. Knock knock... whos there?... sperm! :D"

"If liquor stores ask for ID to prove you're old enough to drink, Forever 21 should ask for ID to prove you're young enough for those shorts."

"No thank you, I don't need a coaster. I won't be putting my drink down."

"What's the difference between a hormone and an enzyme? You can't hear an enzyme."

"People think stage diving is dangerous, but not me. Because humans are made out of 95% water. So the audience is 5% away from being a pool."

"My mother came up to me and said, ""Son, what does MILF stand for?"" I said, ""Mum I'd Like to Fuck"" She said, ""Ok, let me bath first."""

"What do you call a fat computer? A Dell."

"My girlfriend broke up with me after I said she's half the person I am... I weigh 240 pounds, not sure why she got so mad."

"Before you criticize someone... walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you'll be a mile away and have their shoes."

"This is just a quick shout-out to bread bowls, waffle cones and other edible containers. You guys are doing a great job."