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Joke of the Day

"The ""Selfie"" sorority girls Gave there tickets to the less fortunate...I'm my book that makes them charitable women and not very selfie at all"

"What do you call Mariah Carey when she eats at a Indian restuarant? Mariah Curry"

"I don't understand why Obama has to give his speeches behind bullet proof glass. I mean,I know he's black and all, but I doubt he'll shoot anyone."

"The job interviewer asked about my previous experience. ""Well,"" I began, ""I got the bus. Got lost for a while, walked down some narrow roads and I ended up here."""

"What do you call a group of Mexicans smoking weed? Baked beans"

"Why can't Helen Keller drive? She's a woman!"

"Heard this one in a film you all might have seen A man is talking to his son and says, ""You know, son, if you don't stop masturbating, you're going to go blind."" The son says, ""Dad, I'm over here."""

"Q: ""How long were you at your last job?"" A: ""Seven-and-a-half inches... same as now"""

"Don't get mad. Get odd. Like incredibly odd. Show up in a clown suit to their work. Draw potatoes on all their mirrors. Make them be afraid."

"Hey baby, is your name Polio? Because I am stiff below the waist"