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Joke of the Day

"What do you get when you are the daughter of Rodney Dangerfield and Aretha Franklin? No R-E-S-P-E-C-T."

"Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because someone threw a fridge at him."

"What does relative humidity mean to a redneck? The sweat that forms on your nuts when you're banging your sister."

"I had a call from a charity asking me to donate old clothes for starving people. I told them anybody who fits into my clothes isn't starving"

"What do Australian emos use to cut their wrists? Rise up lights"

"so, Spring has sprung & love must be in the air, cause that's the 4th cloud I've seen shaped like an erection today. see it kids?! THERE!!"

"What did the brown dwarf say to the bartender? I'd like a Corona, please."

"I really hate picketing but I don't know how to show it! RIP Mitch"

"If you see a guy in an executioner's hood feeding a deer into a Coinstar today just let me do my thing."

"My views are my own, although they're heavily based on some stuff Jon Stewart said on TV last night, and the general vibe of the internet."