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Joke of the Day

"I've never dumped a girl. I always lay them peacefully in a field to be discovered by school children"

"I need some white people jokes. I was talking with some guys at work and came to find that we are all disappointed at the lack of white people joke we know, so let hear what you've got."

"The worst analogy ever is like pudding."

"This donut scented car air freshener is going to pay for itself next time I get pulled over."

"Personal space is a concept I did not understand in Kindergarten I guess that's why they fired me."

"I have two feelings in Ramadan, it's either ""I'm hungry"" or ""I shouldn't have eaten this much"""

"She won't admit she's obsessed with Instagram... But her kids' names are Brannan, Kelvin, and Valencia."

"What do you have when you have a cow and two ducks? Milk and quackers."

"I hate being bipolar... But it's also pretty awesome sometimes."

"I'm sorry and I apologize are the same thing... Unless it's at a funeral."