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Joke of the Day
"I can never remember, is it ""break a leg"" or ""choke and die""? My niece looked pretty upset."
Next Joke
"Why should you never trust advice from a group of gryphons? Half of them are lyin'."
"I almost died last night. I woke up at 3am and MY FOOT WAS HANGING OFF THE EDGE OF THE BED. NOT EVEN UNDER THE COVERS."
"Hilary's reaction to learning Bill has been cheating. ""I know."""
"Does WebMD ever just say ""you're fine, there's nothing wrong with you, go play outside you drama queen?"""
"Did you know they're killing off a main character in my little pony? There's no more apple jack."
"Sometimes when my gf is asleep, I like to sneak into the living room, put on her dress, and pretend I wear the pants in this relationship."
"Thousands of religions and you're damned if you choose incorrectly? There must be people in Hell asking,""So! What religion are you in for?"""
"Godzilla is a Japanese rendition of Chuck Norris' first visit to Tokyo."
"Sometimes, I like to drink and play guitar..."