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Joke of the Day

"What did the corn say when it was complemented? Aww, shucks!"

"A fellow worker just sent an all office memo: ""Has anyone seen my screwdriver? I really need my screwdriver!"" I wrote back: ""Meet me at the tool bar. I'll buy you a double."""

"What does Rupert the Bear and Jack the Ripper have in common? Same middle name!"

"I know... I know where the percentage symbol goes %50 of the time."

"Why does nobody like the element Bi? Because he's all up in your bismuth."

"I lost my virginity yesterday. My dad incests he did nothing"

"I guess it's good Hillary didn't win... It would be kinda awkward for her to be sitting behind the desk that Monica was under."

"I've never played Jenga, but I have had to extricate myself from a sleeping toddler in my bed, so I think I could handle it."

"I'll never forget my dad's last words before he kicked the bucket ""Hey son, how far do you think I can kick this thing?"""

"Smoking 1: What Cures Smoking 2: Cancer"