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Joke of the Day

"What did the big hairy monster do when he lost a hand? He went to the second-hand shop."

"What is the difference between a baby and a feminist? Eventually, the baby grows up and stops crying. Edit: This turned fun!"

"I was surprised to learn that the Israeli form of martial art was Krav maga... I always thought they used JEWjitzu..."

"[Seahawks locker room] Coach: okay if we want to win we will need to have a bigger number for the score! Wilson: well put! Well put!"

"A movie called Jurrasick Park where there's no dinosaur activity because they're now sick for some reason."

"Why was the cannibal sad at dinner? Because he got the cold shoulder."

"What's red and silly? A blood clot."

"My german shepard doesn't like dog food, so we have that in common."

"A model train set is the male equivalent of 25 cats."

"Me: I can't get the taste of sour balls out of my mouth Friend: I love those candies Me: Candies?"