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Joke of the Day

"I don't care how old you are, the only safe way to guarantee the monster under the bed doesn't grab you is to use the run and jump method."

"The detective knew exactly what the murder weapon was. It was a brief case."

"What does a paedophile do at the beach? Lilo."

"What's a bee-line ? The shortest distance between two buzz-stops !"

"To be honest you were our third choice for this poisoner job but the other two got poiso... oh that was you, nice"

"Her cup size will determine how long the hug will last!"

"Edited from my mistake earlier today: what do paedophiles and napalm have in common? They can both strip a Vietnamese orphan in under 30 seconds."

"Dearly beloved, we are gathered together before God & these witnesses to observe the following: 2, 3, 5, 7, 11, 13, 17, 19 -Prime Minister"

"Britney Spears' career That's the joke."

"Knock knock Come in Sorry "